As therapists, we are trained to try to heal with our words. Yet many of our most powerful therapeutic moments actually come in that brief period between spoken thoughts. Using therapeutic silence with your clients can be a way to help them uncover hidden truths about themselves while also learning the value of silence in their own personal lives.

As a profession, we tend to want to fill up the silence as fast as possible. After all, we are not immune to feelings of awkwardness or that uncomfortable sensation when a pause becomes more than just a pause. But leaning into the silence can actually be a very powerful instrument.

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Try it next time. Instead of reaching for the next intervention or thinking of the next perfect question, just be. In silence (supportive silence, that is.)

We aren’t saying to not talk. Of course not but new therapists often get caught in the trap of over-talking. We tend to want to play the role of expert and solver but that really is not our role. We are there to guide our clients to making their own best choices and sometimes silence offers the perfect route for clients to come to their own realisations.

Clinical supervision is all about learning new methods, trying new techniques and never becoming stale as a therapist. Incorporating therapeutic silence into your work can be another tool in your tool belt that will come in handy more than you think. Sometimes, there just isn’t anything that can be said that will make the situation better. Sometimes, acceptance is our only option.

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Try it the next time you are working with a client. When the urge comes to fill a moment up with words, try to sit back, take a deep breath and let the client decide the next move. Teaching our clients to be comfortable with silence also teaches them to be comfortable with anxiety. As anxiety is likely our most common complaint, this can become a superpower if taught properly. There aren’t always answers and there isn’t always the exact right way to move forward. Silence allows us to take pause, to think, to feel and to experience. Don’t think of therapy as the exchange of words. Think of it as an exchange of silence that will help to shift the clients perspective on their issue.

Although we call ourselves therapists, we often take on the role of teachers. Our clients are coming to us for help in navigating complex emotions like depression and anxiety and sometimes the best way to deal with these is by accepting them. The more you fight against something, the stronger it becomes. Silence allows us to stop fighting. To relax. To trust that, even though it doesn’t look like it, things will work out and we will survive. Throwing extra words into the situation isn’t going to change it, so allow the silence to do some of the heavy therapeutic lifting.

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Of course, this is meant as general advice. We are not condoning sitting silent as your clients pour their hearts out. Rather, this is meant for the therapists who abhor silence and do whatever it takes to fill it. For those therapists learning the trade in clinical supervision, silence can be golden.